A Peek At My Query Letter

I mentioned earlier in the week about my new and improved query letter.  Since this blog is a journal about my journey to become a published author, I thought I’d share the query letter with you.

First, a few tidbits:

1)      This is a very rough draft.  This has not been torn apart by anyone.  This isn’t even a draft so much as an idea of what I might want in the end.

2)      Yeah, query letters used to be one page, typed, single spaced.  Now that everyone uses email, agents are like “250 words fits in my email reading pane.  Use 250 words.”  Some go as high as 350 words.

3)      When done this will be a template.  It’ll be tailored to each agent’s wish list in a query.

4)      Yep, some agents want to know about your writing history.  Some cool facts about you that aren’t writing related.  Others want information about the story (word count, genre, who might read it, ect.)  Yet, all agents want to know about the actual novel

With that in mind, I present my not-quite-ready-for-primetime Query Letter tentatively titled QUERY LETTER ATTEMPT GAZILLION.  I’d say “enjoy” but that would mean it was worth at least a draft in the title.

Dear Agent Person,

Sixteen and finally returning home.  Home to the first foster family she ever knew.  Home to horses, cattle and West Texas cowboys she’s always thought of as family.  Back to the perfect Forever Home that fills her dreams at night.

Except that nothing is ever perfect in Alexandria’s life.  A corrupt ATF agent is in control of Alexandria.  Her job is to get information back to the agent about Hans Zeidrich, the leader of the Texas Aryan Nation.  If Alexandria fails the agent will make sure she winds up on the streets.  If she does what he wants she’ll be responsible for putting Hans in jail and still lose the chance at her dream Forever Home.

Hans is a well-known neo-Nazi leader known for family values.  Yet, life on the compound is anything but safe for the sixteen year old.  Alexandria is a way to split the leadership; Hans and Peter.  Suddenly, she finds herself targeted by factions of the organization.  Poison.  Men in her bedroom.  Attack at the pool.  Guards watching her every move.  The corrupt ATF agent and his men after her.

Sixteen and feeling like she’s already a woman.  A frightened child hiding behind a wall to keep the pain of rejection away.  Can Alexandria really find her heart’s desire; a return home to a family that loves her?


Amanda Nicole Trisdale


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